A man walks up to the counter of a pawn shop holding an old, weathered guitar. “I’d like your expert opinion on this guitar, how much do you think it’s worth?” he asks.
The pawnbroker looks it up and down. “Well, I can tell right now that there’s a little warping in the neck, the lacquer is faded and there are scratches and dents all over it. It’s an old, well-played guitar so I don’t think it’s worth any more than $20.”
The old man reaches his hand out and says, “Okay, if that’s what you think it’s worth… you have a deal!”
“Great!” replies the pawnbroker, shaking his hand.
“Here’s $20,” says the old man. “I’ll buy it right now.”
The broker stops and suddenly looks confused. “Wait … buy?” he asks.
“Yes,” says the man as he flips the guitar over, “This one has a sticker price of $150, but now that I have your honest opinion, I think $20 is a great deal!”
Read: Friday Funnies: Hearty humour
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A guy walks into a bar, puts a box on the counter and takes out a tiny piano. Then he takes out a tiny man, seats him at the piano and gets him to play.
The bartender is amazed and says, “That’s amazing, where did you get him?”
The guy says, “I was walking on the beach and I came across an old lamp. I was cleaning it up when a genie appeared and told me I could make a wish.”
“Wow, can I try it?”
The guy gives him the lamp, the bartender rubs it, the genie appears and the bartender makes his wish.
Suddenly, hundreds and hundreds of ducks start piling into the bar.
The bartender says “I think your genie is hard of hearing. I asked for a million bucks, not a million ducks.”
The guy says, “Tell me about it! Do you think I asked for a 12-inch pianist?”
Read: Friday Funnies: Going deaf
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A percussionist, tired from being ridiculed by other musicians, decides to change instruments. He walks into a music shop and says, “I’ll take that red trumpet over there, and that accordion.”
After a second, the shop assistant says, “Okay, you can have the fire extinguisher, but the radiator stays.”
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