Today is International Literacy Day, so in honour of that worthy cause we have decided to find some jokes about all things reading and books. Read all about it and hopefully have a laugh or two.
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What would you find in Charles Dickens’ pantry?
The best of thyme, the worst of thyme.
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I once held a Ph.D in the field of literature. And then he asked me to put him down.
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What do you call an Italian dish that is equal but more equal than other Italian dishes?
Animal parm.
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What kind of dinosaur writes romance novels?
A Brontësaurus.
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Why did Shakespeare only write in pen?
He couldn’t decide which type of pencil to use – a 2B or not 2B.
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Why did the comma break up with the apostrophe? Because it was too possessive.
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What do you get when you mix American Literature and alcohol?
Tequila Mockingbird.
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What happened when Past, Present, and Future walked into a bar? It was tense.
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What did the maths book say to the literature book? I envy you, you’re so full of stories and I’ll I’ve got is problems.
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I have been reading a book about anti-gravity. I just cant put it down
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Why did the librarian fall down?
He was in the non-friction section.
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Where does the library keep books about conspiracies?
Right behind you.
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A hungry lion roamed through the jungle looking for his next meal when he came upon two men.
One man was sitting under a tree reading a book. The other man was writing in a notebook. The lion quickly pounced in the man reading the book and devoured him. Even the king of the jungle knows that reader’s digest and writers cramp.
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Did you hear the one about the pregnant woman who went into labour and began to yell, “Couldn’t! Wouldn’t! Shouldn’t! Didn’t! Can’t!”? She was having contractions.
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Let’s eat grandma.
Let’s eat, grandma.
Punctuation saves lives.
Also read: Lawyers, drunks and genies
