Q: What do you get from sitting on the ice too long?
A: Polaroids!
•••
Q: Why don’t mountains catch colds?
A: They wear snow caps.
•••
There are two cows in a field. One says to the other “I’m cold. Are you cold?”
The other cow replies, “Yeah, I’m Friesian.”
•••
Q: Why did the cow jump over the moon?
A: Because the farmer had cold hands.
•••
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Atch
Atch who?
•••
A man comes home early from work to find the windows of his house all steamed up and a strange car in the driveway. He bursts through his bedroom door and sees his wife in bed with another man, and cries out “Oh, thank god, I thought someone had left the heater on!”
•••
Q: Why don’t kangaroos get cold?
A: They wear fur-mal underwear.
•••
Q: What did the icy Arctic road say to the truck?
A: Want to go for a spin?
•••
Frank lives in Queensland with his family. His granddaughter, who lives down in Melbourne, called him on Zoom.
“It’s been so cold lately hasn’t it, Pop?” she said, rugged up in thermals.
“It sure has!” said Frank. “It got down to 24°C the other day!”
•••
Q: What do you call a snowman in the desert?
A: A puddle!
•••
Q: Why are there only snowmen and not snowwomen?
A: Because only a man would stand out in the snow without a coat.
•••
Q: Why can’t Eskimos tell jokes?
A: Because the ice cracks up.
•••
Q: What is the favourite Mexican food of snowman?
A: Brrrr-itos.
•••
Q: What’s an ig?
A: A house without a loo!
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